Wednesday, August 30, 2006

busqueda en google

It's kind of scary how google knows where you are. I wonder if google is Santa Claus in disguise. I googled something just now and all the results were in Spanish. I'm in Mexico by the way. I'm supposed to be downstairs in 15 minutes to leave for the airport but thought I was jot this down cause I thought it was so bizarre. We got down here last night and went out for a while, ate, and had a good time. Then we went to lunch a while ago and my stomach has decided it hates the food down here. All I had was a burger. This 3 hour flight coming up could be unpleasant. I'm going to XNA for a short night tonight. I'll blog more later when I'm not supposed to be packing and rushing out the door. Good times.

Sunday, August 27, 2006

You make the rockin' world go round

Where do I begin... I have a lot to say but am afraid of sounding cliche or dramatic. I hate the uber emotional, heart-wrenching (or attempted heart-wrenching) blogs that so many people spit out. But since the point of this is documentation, and today seems to be a day worth documenting, I'll blog anyway.

I woke up this morning to the news that there had been a plane crash. Kind of bizarre in light of a conversation I had had last night (more on that later). The plane was the type of plane I work on, but flown by our sister Delta Connection, Comair. As we all know, all but one of the people on the plane was killed. From what it sounded like, they didn't even have a chance to get out of the plane. And once again, I was struck by the brevity of life. I've heard of lots of things that I knew were tragedies, but since I'd never been close to that situation, or anyone in the situation, I could only feel a certain amount of sorrow for the people involved. This hits a lot closer to home than almost anything that has happened in a long time. This could have been me. It could have been my friend. It could have been the guy that worked the flight I took coming back from Israel's the other day. I can't tell you the number of times I've flown out of the Lexington airport. I go up there a lot to visit friends, and bad things aren't supposed to happen in Lexington. It's bluegrass country. Nothing is supposed to happen on the flights I work. The CRJs are safe planes, and we only fly to puny cities. Something bad did happen though and I can only hurt for the people who lost their family members and friends. Life is short. Things like this are a good reminder to stop and make sure our lives are the way they should be. I'm trying not to get all typical and cliche, but I think there's a reason people get this way when bad things happen. This morning I got to go to church. It was good to be there. Good to be surrounded by people who love me and who love God. Then I had a lovely lunch with my family. I helped my mom pick cherry tomatoes and flowers out of their garden, and as we walked back to the house I couldn't help thinking how good it was to be alive.

I think that's all of that for now. I was going to fly up and see Chasity tonight but am really tired and just couldn't bring myself to. I'll go in the morning. I posted an ad on craigslist to sell my old Civic and have had a ton of people email. Supposedly some guy is coming to look at it now and I've got another guy that keeps calling as well. One sounds French and the other Russian and I can hardly understand either of them. Hopefully it sells. It'd be perfect timing since I seem to be broke (again).

Back to last night's conversation and associated thoughts of late - I think for a long time I've prided myself in not letting things bother me. I'm not very squeamish. I'm not scared of many things. I don't mind things that are unpleasant when I know there is a reason for them. But it seems like lately a lot of these things are starting to bother me. I don't like it. I find myself getting a little weirded out by odd things planes do (I hesitate to even mention that because I know a lot of you only fly because of your faith in crewmembers - but I'm human!!) I almost puked the other day when I was cleaning out a chicken and had to cut the neck out. I went to the doctor the other day and really didn't like it. Next thing you know waxing is going to be intolerable and I'm going to think feet are disgusting. I don't really know where this is going. I just don't like the current trend of thoughts that are going through my mind. I don't want my life to be governed by fear or limited by weakness.

I need to go track this guy down. It's past my bedtime.

Saturday, August 26, 2006

V for vegetable

It's Saturday night and I'm watching V for Vendetta with the roomies, Joe and Jamie. I don't know what's wrong with me but I just don't care much for movies these days. It's interesting though. Kind of gruesome and harsh.

I got back from work today. I thought we were going to get our last round trip canceled but no such luck. Instead we waited almost 2 hours for our plane to get fixed to take 40 people to Cleveland and bring 16 back. Oh well. The pilots are fun which makes it more tolerable. I think 2 days is the perfect length for a trip. Then, the first day of work is just the first day, and the second day is the day I go home. It's amazing how much a difference it makes in my day when one or two people have a normal conversation with me during my work day.

This movie is getting weird so I have to go follow it. I don't know what the point of this blog was. Maybe next time. I'm off to Iowa tomorrow to see Chas. Be back Tuesday so I can go work on Wednesday for 6 days. Good times had by all. Toodles.

Friday, August 25, 2006

yum yum jordan almonds

I'm glad that though I have days where I absolutely cannot motivate myself to do anything productive, there are other days when I get so much done. Since I got home from Arkansas yesterday I think I've done 5 loads of laundry, including my clothes, linens, and towels. It feels good to have everything folded, hung and put away. Feels good to go to my closet and know that all of my clothes are in there and are clean.

Yesterday when I came back from Arkansas I had the most frustrating time in the airport. I think I'm spoiled because I've gotten used to being treated like a crew member and not being hassled about every little thing. Yesterday it was completely opposite. I got crap about the shirt I was wearing, and after I changed someone didn't like that one either (we have to go by a certain dress code when we fly on our own). Because of the shirt hassle I missed the direct flight to Atlanta and had to go through Cincinnati. I except this crap from Delta agents cause sometimes they look down their noses at us and give us a hard time, but these were my very own coworkers. The same people I've seen many times over the last few months when I fly in and out of XNA for work... All I can say is that those people better never ever get on one of my flights.

Do you ever notice how sometimes you put so much energy into looking for something in what someone is saying that you actually miss what they're saying? It's hard when you're used to a certain feeling being behind all of someone's words, and when it starts to go away it distracts from everything they say. I think it takes a long time to be able to stop looking for that something and just hear and enjoy what they're saying.

I have a question: How do you go about getting closer to someone, whether it be a family member, friend, coworker? There are people in my life that I would like to be closer to. People I would like to know better than I do now, but I know it will be at one sided effort, at least at first. I don't know where to begin or what to do.

Another question I have is how come I have 94 views on my blog this week and only 6 comments??? Is there one person out there who just views my blog over and over? It's quite puzzling.

I need to go iron my uniform and get ready for work. Thankfully I'll only be gone until tomorrow afternoon. I got a call today from the Spalding County DA's office. They want to know the monetary value of the things that were stolen out of my car in January. I don't want to get excited about it, but it sure would be nice if I got some money for the things I had to replace.

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

gettin jiggy with the arKansans

Greetings from the great state of arKansas. I got here yesterday afternoon and have been helping my brother fix up his house. He's trying to sell it before he moves to China. It was random - on the way out here I rode next to a guy who mentioned flying into Hong Kong. I asked him if he had been to China very often and if so, where. I hadn't told him why I was coming here or anything. He said that he had been over quite a few times for business and whenever he went he usually went to a city near Shanghai called Ningbo. This happens to be the city Israel is moving to. It was really bizarre that out of all the people I could have sat next to and all the places they could've gone, it was the same place he'll be going. Life's crazy like that.

So yesterday and today I've been painting, power washing (it should be a hobbie, it's so much fun. you feel so powerful), stripping (paint off the floor you dirty minded folk), sanding, pulling nails out... I think it's so amazing how God made our bodies to be so cleanable. Right now I have paint, bug spray, dirt, sweat, and who knows what else on me. It's kind of freeing to not care if your clothes dirty and to know that whatever you get on you, will be gone right after you shower (and you all know what a big fan of showers I am). I don't know why that impresses me today, but it does, and since this is my blog, I'm going to write about it.

Our September schedules came out yesterday and turns out I'm going to be flying with my good buddy Joe all month. Fun times :-). And in case that wasn't enough to make me happy, I have three weekends off next month. Life is definitely getting better. I have nothing profound to say. Today I'm happy. Can't ask for much more than that, can I? For those of you who care, I should be home tomorrow afternoon or evening. Friday I have to go to the doctor and then to work til Saturday. Then I'm off to Iowa on Sunday night to see a very pregnant Chasity.

Good times.

Monday, August 21, 2006

If it isn't one thing...

I finally got my tag for my car. It was a lot cheaper than I thought it would be which is fantastic. I give Joy a whole lot of crap cause she always loses stuff, but sometimes I feel like if my head weren't attached to my body I would lose it. Somewhere between the tag office and the Credit Union, I lost my driver's license. So stupid. It could be in the parking lot where I stopped to put my tag on. It could be in my car somewhere. It could be in the thriftstore where I dropped some clothes off. Or by our mailbox when I stopped here to get the mail... Crap. I was so scared driving to the tag office. I had to find somewhere to get my emissions done before I could my tag and was scared the whole time that I'd get pulled over again. There are about a million cops in Fairburn. Anyway, it's done and I'm so happy.

Tanya gave me the cutest shirt the other day. It has Tinkerbell on it and says-
Pixie: in English folklore spirit or fairy. The pixie is commonly represented as a feisty imp who delights in making mischief.
It's so cute. I think in another life I was Tinkerbell .

It's nice not having to go to work for another few days. I'm going to Arkansas tomorrow morning to help my brother get his house ready to sell. Before then, I have all kinds of important things to do, like re-do my toenails. Evidently my toes are too long and my shoes rub my polish off. I'm also planning to order my new quilt today. I hate how whenever I have a lot of time off I can never remember what I need to do. I did get a lot done already today though. My watch has decided to work sporadically. When I woke up this morning it said it was 4, even though it was 10:30. Then a few hours ago it started going again. Hmmm.

I had some interesting passengers on my last flight. I need to write about them as I come across them or I'll forget. On the way back from Mexico I saw a little girl with the longest eyelashes I've ever seen. I thought they were fake. I wanted to take a picture for proof but figured her mom might thing I was a little weird. I also had a guy get on my flight going from Atlanta to Little Rock. He was obviously upset when he got on the plane. He was sweating so bad there were dry spots on his shirt. He said he was claustrophobic and couldn't handle the little planes. I tried shutting the curtain while we were sitting there and he looked like he was going to lose it. Then he asked me how far a drive it was to Little Rock. I'm like, you've got to be kidding me... Then he asked for alcohol. Asked where the nearest airport to was LR was that he could fly into on a bigger plane. Said he was on medicine that intensified everything around him (I guess making our small plane seem smaller). Finally after about 15 minutes of this, me trying to distract him by talking about his job interview etc... he decided he had to get off the plane. I was pretty relieved. He was a big guy and if he had decided at a later point in the flight that he needed to get off, I don't know what I would've done. Good times had by all.

I guess I should go do my laundry or something productive. I had Taco Bell today and though it was super good, my stomach now hates me. I'm not sure if it was the quesadilla, the taco, or the huge Code Red Mountain Dew...

I've been reading these books lately by Marion Keyes. They're all girlie kind of books. Not romance or anything, just funny stories about 20 or 30 something girls. The thing is, though they're funny books, each one I've read so far deals with some fairly serious issues that people have. One of the girls was in rehab and it followed her through figuring out why she did drugs, why she was drawn to people who were bad for her, and other such issues. It's been really interesting and makes me think a lot about myself and other people I know. Maybe I've been thinking too much now... That can be almost as bad as not thinking enough.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Living in a powder keg and giving off sparks...

She's wearing synthetic plaids. It's a four day drive and a boat ride to the place called hope.

Oh how I love Karen from Will & Grace. Can you believe I had a guy the other on my plane ask me, mid-chuckle, "How's Will?" I couldn't even make myself fake laugh. Some people are so stupid.

It's Sunday night and I'm off work. It's nice. I went to church today. I spent the afternoon with my family which was very lovely. My mom cooks such yummy food. I don't really have anything to say. Well I probably do but can't be bothered to think that much right now. So I'll go rot my brain some more and see what other lovely things Karen will come up with.

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

much better, thankyou

I appreciate those of you who expressed concern about how crappy I felt this morning. I took some medicine and put ice on my face and finally fell back asleep. I felt a lot better when I woke up except that I realized the title still wasn't here. The drama continues. Supposedly it's supposed to be here TOMORROW morning, which means I still have no car. Once again, my dear kind friend/roommate Tanya lent me her car so I could run errands but it's sooo frustrating. This is what you get for being nice and trusting people.

Yesterday when all this frustration starting coming to a head and I was venting Adri was like "well Grace, it sounds like life really bitch slapped you today." It seems that life is on a roll. She called me back this morning and said that she had just gotted bitch slapped by life. She's supposed to move out of her apartment at the end of the month. When she went to work this morning she got a call from her landlord that said her lease had expired yesterday and she had to move out today!! They're being completely ridiculous. Adri, I'm sending my good moving vibes to you. Hope it's going alright. Then, a few hours later Tanya gets a call from Joe saying that their apartment had just gotten broken into. Nothing was stolen, but the front door was kicked in. This guy had come knocking on the door asking for someone. Joe said he didn't live there so the guy went upstairs. Joe left to go over to the gym and the guy saw him leave. When he came back the door was open. Good times. I love our complex. I'm so glad we live on the top floor. So I guess my carlessness (not carelessness) isn't the worst thing happening. When I say that it makes me feel silly cause my life really isn't bad at all, but I still whine a lot. My life is not only not bad, it's freaking awesome compared to 99% of the rest of the world.

I should probably be packing for my trip instead of sitting here watching tv... Oh well. I'm going to be in Monterrey, Mexico tomorrow night and Fayetteville, AR Friday night. I'm quite pleased about being off on Sunday. It's been a while since I got to go to church and I really miss it. I just submitted my bid for next month - not that I'm going to get what I want. We'll see what craziness I end up with.

And that's all I've got to say about that.

2006 Vintage Whine

There's nothing quite like starting a new day with throbbing pain in half of your face. I'm not sure but I may be sick. The only other reason I would be awake since 7am would be work, but I'm off today. I've been lying here in bed for the last nearly three hours putting an ice pack on my face and reading. My sinuses on the left side of my face hurt so bad and my mom said cold helps. Good times. Nothing like having a frozen eyeball. I was going to blog yesterday but was a bit frustrated so I decided to wait since today couldn't help but be a better day (or so I thought).

I still haven't received the title for my car, therefore my car is illegal to drive. The frustration is unreal. Supposedly it's going to be delivered before 10am, so they've got 11 minutes to show up. This is such a pain though. I've had to borrow Tanya's car to get anywhere (good thing I have such nice friends). It makes me so mad when people don't do what they're supposed to do. And at this point, really all I can do is be mad. I don't think these people are trying to screw me over. I just think they're serious slackers.

I'm going to try to go back to sleep. My face won't stop hurting and now it's making the rest of my head hurt. It's so weird because I went to sleep last night and felt perfectly fine and woke up this morning feeling like I had concrete in my sinuses - and only on one side. Weird stuff. I'll write more later when I stop feeling like my head is going to explode.

Sunday, August 13, 2006

the glamour never ends

It's amazing how last week's trip and this one feel so different. They're nearly identical. 5 legs Friday, 2 Saturday, 2 Sunday, and 3 on Monday. The two main differences that I'm aware of are 1. I was off 3 days before starting this one, instead of already having worked 4 days and 2. I haven't have to get up early since Tuesday. I'm not sure which has more of an impact. Whatever it is though, I feel so much better this trip. At the beginning of my trip I didn't feel like working. I had enjoyed being off for 3 days. Enjoyed going to sleep every night for a few nights and knowing that I really didn't have to do anything the next day if I didn't want to. I was wondering if I even liked my job anymore. Now, after 3 days of work, I still do like it. I have a lot of things to say but don't feel like writing a book so maybe I'll just jot them down so I can remember them. That is the whole point of this thing, isn't it?

- I got pulled over the other day for the second time for not having my tag. Had to be a jerk to finally track down my title. I hate when people make me do that.
- I had two people tell me within 5 minutes of each other that I looked like Princess Diana.
- I got to see someone I knew on my last two overnights. First was in Tulsa. Had lunch with my friend Kim. Second was in Montgomery last night and today where I saw a lot of my mom's side of the family, including my fabulous cousin Susan, who turned 25 yesterday.
- I really like the Hilton Garden Inn. If it wasn't wrong to steal and a king size bed would fit in my luggage I'd steal this one. And the pillows.
- On the way to Tulsa the other night I had an old guy offer to take me horse back riding the next day. Bummer I had to leave...
- Everyone knows I'm in over my head.
- I swapped my three day with early duty-ins this Fri-Sun for one with late duty-ins Thurs-Sat so I have 5 days off next week. I'll also spend Thursday night in Monterrey and Friday night in Arkansas.
- I got a bunch of books from my cousin which makes me really happy.
- I need to start exercising so I can stop feeling so disgusted with myself.
- Four days is a long time to be at work.
- It took us 28 minutes to fly from Montgomery to Atlanta. It took us 47 minutes to get from touchdown on the runway into a parking spot. Gotta love the ol' ATL...

I'm not really tired cause I slept really late today, but I guess I should try to sleep since it's midnight back home. I'm in McAllen, TX. I wish I was in my bed but hopefully I will be there this time tomorrow, or at least at home hanging out with my friends. I wish I at least had someone to entertain me. Oh well... Maybe next time.

Thursday, August 10, 2006

move like a jellyfish, rhythm is nothing

You know, if you really think about life sometimes, it'll scare you to death. I don't think I'm hiding my head in the sand, but I think you have to realize that there are certain things that just aren't healthy to dwell on. I've just finished reading the most recent article on CNN.com about the terror threats that were discovered this morning. Good times... I can't wait to go to work tomorrow. Good thing I'm only flying to places like Roanoke, Tulsa, Montgomery, etc...

This whole going back to work thing doesn't make me happy. It was so nice for the last two days to know that there wasn't anything I had to do the next day. Now I'm having to do laundry and get ready for work again. Ugh. The good thing is, I get to spend Saturday night and a huge part of Sunday in Montgomery where my mom's side of the family lives.

My head is all in a kerfuffle right now. I'm not sure why. I just have a lot of things on my mind. Things I have to do. People I need to call. Stuff I have to take care of before I go to work. Plus a load of other stuff that just lives inside my head and harasses me. Sometimes I don't like myself very much. My priorities are really out of whack these days. I need to sort myself out. Let go of that which needs to be let go of (easier said than done). Embrace the things that are important... I'm stressing about money again. I know I said a while back that things were better, but I haven't seen my first check from my raise and my new schedule yet. So I'm just hanging on until then. Trying not to focus on it too much.

More cheerful subjects - J and I painted one wall in my room the other day and it looks great. When you walk in my room the opposite wall has a big window on it looking out at the trees behind our apartment. The wall is kind of an olive green and it kind of blends in with the outdoors. It's exactly what I wanted it to do but was worried that it would just look like pea soup instead. So when I get paid again I'm going to get that quilt and some other stuff and before you know it, my room will be beautiful! That makes me really happy.

Other things that make me happy: I've done some serious work on my tan this week (if I'm not going to do anything about my fat I need to at least keep it tan!). I got some white linen capris which are said to look hot on me. We finally have a functioning dryer (doing laundry as I type). I don't have any early duty-ins on this trip. I'm going to see my family today.

I guess that's all for now. I love Jack Johnson. I love Davefm and Mara. Check out radio free lunch every day from 12-1. I'm a dork that I'm plugging a radio station in my blog but I like Mara that much. Every day they have a topic and play songs that have to do with it. It's fun.

Sunday, August 6, 2006

Georgia on my mind

(that song is playing in the hotel lobby right now)

What a week... I've worked every day since Monday and don't finish until tomorrow afternoon. These last four days, especially, have been a constant personal pep talk. I tell myself, I don't know how I'm going to do this. I can't do 5 more flights. I can't do that many more announcements... Then I tell myself, Grace, you don't have a choice. You have to do this. Then I feel like crying, but people worry when their flight attendant cries so I don't. And I've learned it doesn't really help at all.

This morning I woke up late. It was 0521. I've been worn down physically and emotionaly for days. I think I've slept one night at home in the last week. I've seen one person I know in the last 3 days. Have hardly talked to anyone, but honestly don't have the energy to talk to anyone. It's weeks like this that make me wonder how long I can do this job. I have to remind myself I'm just tired. This isn't how it always is. It's the beginning of the month so I got integrated which means I work 8 days in a row instead of the usual 3 or 4.

We flew back from Kalamazoo at 630 this morning and when we landed in Atlanta I was having the same back and forth conversation with myself. Somewhere along the way I remembered I don't have to handle these things on my own. I know there are places in Psalms where it says that David encouraged himself. It's kind of a funny thing, but sometimes there isn't anyone else to do it. The Lord reminded me of several verses - I can do all things through Christ... if I wait on the Lord He renews my strength, I'll mount on wings like eagles, run and not faint... I finally told God, I need something or someone to help me get through this. I only had 2 flights today which is great but it seemed like 2 too many. We had to switch planes when we got to Atlanta and the plane we got didn't have the air working on the ground. They were working on fixing it so the captain told me to go inside and wait. So I did and took a little catnap. I woke up to see my good buddy Tom standing next to me. He gave me big hugs. It was so nice to see a familiar face and get a hug. Then I went out to the plane and the passengers came on. There was an old couple sitting in the front row. The man could hardly walk, but the lady was by him the whole time. They were pretty old but she always had her arm through his and her hand on his hand, stroking it and smiling and talking to him. They looked so happy together. I asked them if they were married and how long they had been married. She said 49 years!! I said well it looks like you guys still like each other. They both said they really did and that they laughed a lot together. It really cheered me up in a lot of ways. They were so happy, even after all these years.

This is a whole lot of nothing really. Just rambling. I'm still tired but I'm in Naples, FL and am trying to kick myself hard enough to find my way to the beach. I was going to go earlier but it started pouring down rain. I think it's a few miles away, but I could use the exercise.

I hope everyone is having a blessed Sunday. It's so easy to get bogged down by life and forget how good we/I really have it.

PS. If anyone knows of a place on the gulf that I could go chill with my sister for a day or two before she goes back to college let me know.

Tuesday, August 1, 2006

combos give you the worst breath ever

I feel very happy at the moment and to be honest I don't know exactly why. I know that seems weird to say. I have every reason to be happy. I have a great life. But sometimes you feel happier than other times when the circumstances haven't changed at all. I'm actually really tired which usually subtracts from my happiness. There are several things that I know are contributing factors to this good feeling though. 1. I just finished my last nap of the month. It's a new month and I start a new schedule tomorrow. 2. I came home to a reasonably neat room. Not finished but definitely reduced mess/clutter. Many steps in the right direction. 3. I saw a bunch of my favorite people at work this morning. 4. My little sisters are coming home today and I've talked to my family more lately than usual and they still love me. 5. I don't have to work tonight. I think those are enough reasons for now.

I've seen so many of my friends lately. It's made me realize all over again how blessed I am to have so many wonderful people in my life that care about me. Even silly things like the comments people leave on my blogs remind me of that. We were counting up on Saturday and I realized that nearly all of my close girl friends have been my roommates at one point or another. I have fabulous guy friends as well. People that I know I can call at any time, even if it's just to hear someone say they love me.

I know life can be an emotional roller coaster and tomorrow I might be the most depressed person around. I think that's why I like to document the ups and downs of life, so I can go back tomorrow or next week and remind myself why my life is so good and of the million reasons I have to be happy. 6. I just got my one year raise, and that combined with having a regular line means that there is light at the end of the financial tunnel I've been in for the last few years. I think this is a huge part of the general good feeling. I'm sure everyone understands how much financial problems can affect the rest of your life, so to be able to breathe a little easier and have a little more control over my income is truly a wonderful thing.

And now I will sleep. Hasta la boxers.